Dads play a pivotal role in our lives. Children learn how to temper their emotions and physicality through rough play with dad, and they learn how to form secure and healthy relationships through the influence of their dads.

Children often idealise their dads, but as we get older, we realise their fallibility and their humanity.

As black men, we contend with the stereotypes of the absent father. Some fathers do just up and leave, but the reality is a lot more nuanced than that.

Most ‘absent’ dads don’t just decide to go absent from their children’s lives, sometimes they are constrained by circumstance, unwittingly repeat the traumas of their own progenitors, and lack the emotional intelligence to adequately respond to the crises in their relationships with their partners and children.

The men you’ll hear on this episode have all, in some way, had to navigate parts of their lives where their dads were either physically or emotionally unavailable. We talk about how these moments and experiences shaped us for better or worse, and what we want to take from them to use in our own journeys through manhood.

If you like the podcast and want to give us some feedback, or if you want to be featured on the show, please use the contact form in the ‘About’ section.

In the meantime click the link above to start the episode now and thank you for listening.

My wife and I have been in a relationship together for 10 years and married for almost six of those. Comparatively speaking, that’s still a very short period of time and I still have a lot to learn as a husband. We’ve had our ups and our downs, times when we’ve felt less connected and times we’ve felt inseparable. We make each other angry sometimes, but mostly, we honour our vows to love and cherish each other.

These aren’t unique experiences, every married couple goes through similar journeys and that’s part of the point of this new show. Sometimes in our marriages, it’s easy to feel as though we’re the only one going through a particular situation.

On Marriages Behind Closed Doors, I’ll be joined by other men talking about our experiences as husbands and fathers, coping with the difficulties and celebrating our families’ successes.

Watch live on Instagram once per month on the 3rd Thursday of each month at 8:30pm British Summer Time (BST), and be sure to follow so you don’t miss a thing.

You can catch-up on previous episodes below:

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